Serial Marriage

With the passing of Elizabeth Taylor, a friend asked me if I wanted to do a tribute blog about multiple marriages.  Well my first thought was that someone watches too much television, because Ms. Taylor did not partake in multiple marriages (see Sister Wives); but enjoyed serial marriage. 

Serial monogamy -noun. a form of monogamy characterized by several successive, short-term ... Also called serial marriage. (via Dictionary.com)

I just figure someone like Ms. Taylor is what I call the "marrying kind."  It is easy enough in this day and age to simply have relationships without the benefit of 'a piece of paper' as they say.  But, then there are those who believe 'this is it!'  Romantic?  Idealistic?  In love with love? I like to think so. 

Yet, in order to partake in serial marriage, you would have to deal with the flip side of that...serial divorce.  Marriages end through a variety of ways (death, affairs, substance abuse, violence, or just a bad idea to begin with). I choose to believe, for the most part, when two people decide to unite in marriage, their hearts are in the right place, maybe not their minds, but their hearts.  Certainly, there is that initial 'in love/lust' stage when most of us have made some hasty or less than wise choices.  The true test becomes how we deal with the choices we've made.  I make my living helping people walk through the aftermath of a failed relationship.  Someone once asked me what I liked best about my job and while I believe that litigation is sometimes necessary and unavoidable, my career provides some satisfaction when we are able to help people reach agreements that best suit them and their children.  

I have many clients who state "I'll never marry again!"  First, I don't believe it; and, second, if it's true, how sad for them.  I am a firm believer in marriage.  I love marriage and I love being married.  And, I am also one who has erred in the past.  My only (armchair psychologist) advice is not to ignore those red flags.  The 'I can fix him/her' mentality is dangerous, stupid and unfair.  Someone once said to me, "If the relationship never gets any better than this, is that okay?" 

Let's just say, I hope you get it right the first time.  There's nothing more satisfying than a long healthy happy marriage. Can I fault someone who was seeking that same thing?  No way.

For more information regarding California Family Law contact Stone Law Group at (559) 226-1910.

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